An open letter to Annie: (my nail technician)
Dear Annie (which by the way, I am 110% sure that is not your birth name),
It is so fucking hard to find one hour every two weeks to take the time to visit your facility and get my nails all prettied up. But I do. You see, I am a really prissy bitch so not having pretty nails burns me a new anal orifice. (Look that one up in your translation dictionary).
However, having to go back two days after you do them because you didn't let the fucking gel cure correctly on my little fingertips is a real pisser.
What's worse, dear one, is when two days after you half-assed the repair, the gel started to chip again making my little french tips look like sun baked fish scales glued on my long but lovely fingers!
And to top it off, you charged me $30.oo, expected your customary $5.00 tip and then had the nerve to ask the chick in charge, (the only one that can speak and understand the King's English)if there was a charge for the repair that happened because you fucked up!!
Well, Annie, there happens to be about 5678 different nail salons in town. So this week when I can steal away to get my nails done I will go to Susie's Number 1 Perfect Nail, Lee Top Nail, Wong's Long Dong Nail and let Susie, Lee or Mr. Long Dong perform their magic on my nails! Not you!
Thank you for the really bad nail job and I hope your regs, I mean legs, grow together!!!
Sincerely,
The Queen
2 comments:
Mr. Long Dong does nails now? I wonder what happened to his porn career? ;)
Ron Jeremy is still the king in the porn arena, Parl!
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